Jimmy held on to the reins for dear life, and thought that a horse was about the most slippery creature to sit on that he had ever met. He slithered first one way and then another, and at last he slid...
If I were married, I would be unmarried.
Of course I love you. For real. I will sure come and personally meet you myself. Just to make sure you're well. When is your funeral?
There is nothing more American than buying a Japanese car on the 4th of July
Fuck the pack. I gave them fifteen years of my life. I fought for them, bled for them, and the moment my back was turned, they attacked my wife. I owe them nothing.
Yesterday I bought myself a new, very sharp kitchen knife.And I managed to cut my finger within 5 minutes of getting home!Those plastic packages are bloody dangerous!!!
Er, why do you need to work in a dark room, though? he said. The imps don't need it, do they?Ah, zis is for my experiment, said Otto proudly. You know zat another term for an iconographer would be 'ph...
Ever Tried. Ever Failed. No matter. Try again. Fail again. Fail better.
Percy stormed over to the magical cooler. No one tried to stop him. He knocked open the lid and rummaged throught the ice. There had to be one. Please. He was rewarded with s silver-and-red can of sod...
Don't ask for a girl's hand in marriage and forget to ask for her leg too.
Dead people are just great. Meet me when you are.
Believe you me, I am all for you; and wish you well - for you to go to hell.
An atheist is a person who has nobody to blame when he screws up.
Gone are the days when girls used to cook like their mothers and boys used to dress like their fathers. Now girls drink like their fathers and boys dress like their mothers.
We're famous iggy whispered so low that Fang could barely hear him.So's Swine Flu Fang whispered back.
And, er, these stories about you...Oh, all true. Most of them. A bit of exaggeration, but mostly true.The one about the Citadel in Muntab and the Pash and the fish bone?Oh, yes.But how did you get in...
It was because he wanted there to be conspirators. It was much better to imagine men in some smoky room somewhere, made mad and cynical by privilege and power, plotting over the brandy. You had to cli...
Special Super Bowl Wisdom of the Ages: "Patriot Act" In theater and football, it's the last act before it's curtains for Seahawks opponents.
There are some things you just don't say...not even in a school!
Special Post-Super Bowl Wisdom of the Ages: "Eating Crow" This year, it just tastes like Seahawk.
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