Top Humor Quotes
Instead of being regarded as intelligent or knowledgeable, many a woman would rather be regarded as beautiful or good in the kitchen; many a man, as handsome or good in bed.
People who worry that nuclear weaponry will one day fall in the hands of the Arabs, fail to realize that the Islamic bomb has been dropped already, it fell the day MUHAMMED (pbuh) was born.
(n.) Moisture, especially, the moisture or fluid of animal bodies, as the chyle, lymph, etc.; as, the humors of the eye, etc.
(n.) A vitiated or morbid animal fluid, such as often causes an eruption on the skin.
(n.) State of mind, whether habitual or temporary (as formerly supposed to depend on the character or combination of the fluids of the body); disposition; temper; mood; as, good humor; ill humor.
(n.) Changing and uncertain states of mind; caprices; freaks; vagaries; whims.
(n.) That quality of the imagination which gives to ideas an incongruous or fantastic turn, and tends to excite laughter or mirth by ludicrous images or representations; a playful fancy; facetiousness.
(v. t.) To comply with the humor of; to adjust matters so as suit the peculiarities, caprices, or exigencies of; to adapt one's self to; to indulge by skillful adaptation; as, to humor the mind.
(v. t.) To help on by indulgence or compliant treatment; to soothe; to gratify; to please.
It is usually unbearably painful to read a book by an author who knows way less than you do, unless the book is a novel.
The death of a billionaire is worth more to the media than the lives of a billion poor people.
The more fucked up you are, the more I like you. As long as you've managed to hold onto your identity through all the shit, then it won't matter how twisted you are. I will love you more for it.
Marketing is so powerful that it can make even an extremely untalented musician a one-hundred-hits wonder.
There would definitely be way fewer instances of cheating, if the average couple did not have sex only when the woman feels like it.
Some men can love forever, some for six years, some for six months, and others for six hours.
Asked in 1919 whether it was true that only three people in the world understood the theory of general relativity, [Eddington] allegedly replied: 'Who's the third?
The fact that the person who you are sleeping with is also sleeping with another person or other people does not necessarily mean that he or she does not love you. And the fact that you are the only p...
Two girls walk past in gargantuan heels and dresses so tight that their skin is spilling out, and one of them says to the other, Wait, who the fuck is Lewis Carroll? and in my imagination I pull a gun...
Some people would not have remained with their partners, if the unfortunate things that have happened to them had happened to their partners, or if the fortunate things that have happened to their par...