It's not a nice thing to send a penis to a woman. It's disrespectful.
As much as I disliked Eddie Kuntz, I could sort of identify with a man who got a stiffie over banana cream pie.
My grandmother is a little Cuban woman who cooks all day and speaks Spanish. Your grandmother watches pay-per-view porn.She used to watch the Weather Channel, but she said there wasn't enough action.-...
Ranger was grinning. Somebody beat the shit out of this guy before he got shot. That would be me.I said.Babe,Ranger said, the grin widening.
Ten minutes passed before his (Ranger's) Mercedes appeared at the end of the street, gliding through the rain, sleek and sinister, water not daring to adhere to the paint finish.
One minute I was having a day like any other , and then Whack an this guy didn’t have no head Lula Finger Lickin 15
Ranger was definitely wow. He stood half a head taller than me. He was perfectly toned muscle, and he had classic Latino good looks. He always smelled great. He dressed only in black. His eyes were da...
Your on your on with this one babe.Coward.Calling me names isn't going to get me in there.-Ranger and Stephanie
The rain started a few minutes later, a fine mist at first, growing more steady as the miles flew by. The Mercedes hummed along, following the ribbon of road. The night enveloped us, the darkness brok...
Lula had Eminem cranked up. He was rapping about trailer park girls and how they go round the outside, and I was wondering what the heck that meant. I'm a white girl from Trenton. I don't know these t...
Thinking very often resembles napping, but the intent is different. --Stephanie Plum
Bob had a dog buscuit stuck to his head. How does he always get food stuck to him? I asked Morelli. I don't know, Morelli said. It's a Bob mystery. I think stuff falls out of his mouth and he rolls in...
You ever get any death threats? How about ex-husbands or ex-boyfriends? You run over anyone recently? ~ Morelli
I blink back the threat of tears, swiped at my nose and narrowed my eyes. Listen to me, you two bags of monkey shit, I yelled. I am not in a good mood. My car keeps stalling. The day before yesterday...
Maybe it was me, Grandma said.Sometimes they sneak out.Did I fart?
Why do you give me cars?It's fun, Ranger said.And it keeps you safe. Do you want to know why keeping you safe is important to me?You love me?Yes.A sigh inadvertently escaped. We're really screwed up,...
My sex life is okay.Yeah, Morelli said. But sometimes it's fun to have a partner.
Remember, so swashing anyone into the trunk of your car!Sure, Lula said, I know that
You can relax. I am not here to collect on the dealI blinked. You are not? Then why did you drop your gun belt?I am tired. I wanted to sit and the belt is uncomfortable.Oh.He smiled. Disappointed?No....
You sure you don't want to go? Grandma Mazur asked my mother.I didn't know Moogey Bues, my mother told her. I've got better things to do than to go to a viewing of a perfect stranger.I wouldn't go eit...
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