It's so trendy, almost bleeding to death. All the cool girls are doing it.
I'm sure I look like a drowned cat.You look fine. The wet look works for you.I scowled. Now I know you're lying.
(superl.) Droll; comical; amusing; laughable.
(n.) A clinkerbuit, narrow boat for sculling.
I'm not the one going for a biology degree. I'm just a philosophy major who eats people.
I sat on the bed. Neither of us said anything. I wasn't slick and sophisticated enough for this. What do you say to boyfriend A when he finds you naked in the bed of boyfriend B? Especially if boyfrie...
I know you haven't burned down any buildings in a while, she said, but if you start feeling the need...
What do you do with all your money?Me and the French hoard gold.
There's a rule of writing: if everything is funny, nothing is funny; if everything is sad, nothing is sad. You want that contrast.
I know my strong points: I work hard, I have talent, I'm funny, and I'm a good person.
Thomas, my 15-year-old, is effectively my editor, I've always trusted his voice, more than anybody, on the strip for years. He has one of those ears that's just tuned to the rhythm of humor, so if he...
I hope the next time you get a double-decker strawberry ice-cream cone the ice cream part falls off the cone and lands in Australia.
The secret to happiness is a good sense of humor with adult content.
I got my heart checked, report says it's perfectly normal, there is no trace of love in it
The bastards had done their job well.
My dog hasn't said a word all day, he must have a lot on his mind
Special Post-Super Bowl Wisdom of the Ages: "Eating Crow" This year, it just tastes like Seahawk.
When I was young, I believed God was a woman because I couldn't come up with any other explanation as to why the universe was so tidy.
I like to skip prewriting. I love just jumping into the actual writing process. Then I revise/edit and fix what I need to. Then the following steps; proofread and publish. Of course before you just go...
The universe had no choice but to create intelligent life so that there would be someone else that could simply laugh at how unbelievably, ridiculously and senselessly huge the universe is and how utt...
Once there was an elephant,Who tried to use the telephant-No! no! I mean an elephoneHe tried to use the telephone-(Dear me! I am not certain quiteThat even now I've got it right.)Howe'er it was, he go...
No matter how dire a situation may be, I can always find the humor in it somewhere. If I was ever in a horror movie I would be the goofy one who doesn't seem to know quite what's going on but survives...