When you have got an elephant by the hind leg and he is trying to run away it is best to let him run.
Some people approach every problem with an open mouth.
In uplifting get underneath.
Your vile and bitter diatribes only serve to show how vile and bitter you must be.
Angels fly because they take themselves lightly.
Automatic simply means that you can't repair it yourself.
A diplomat these days is nothing but a head waiter who is allowed to sit down occasionally.
A verbal contract isn't worth the paper it's written on.
Oats n.s. A grain which in England is generally given to horses but in Scotland supports the people.
I have admired W.C. Fields since the day he advanced upon Baby LeRoy with an ice pick. Any man who hates dogs and babies can't be all bad.
An indecent mind is a perpetual feast.
If I look like this I need the trip.
Flint must be an extremely wealthy town I see that each of you bought two or three seats.
The butler entered the room a solemn procession of one.
All would live long but none would be old.
If Roosevelt were alive he'd turn in his grave.
Nothing is impossible for the person who doesn't have to do it.
The ugliest of trades have their moments of pleasure. Now if I was a grave digger or even a hangman there are some people I could work for with a great deal of enjoyment.
Judas needed the money for a sick friend.
I don't deserve this but I have arthritis and I don't deserve that either.