“ I'm realizing that some of my greatest (or at least most determined) genius lies in my ability to procrastinate. Scott Stabile
“ This was not Aunt Dahlia, my good and kindly aunt, but my Aunt Agatha, the one who chews broken bottles and kills rats with her teeth. P.G. Wodehouse
“ The greatest futility! says the congregator, "The greatest futility! Everything is futile!" What does a person gain from all his hard work- At which he toils under the sun? A generation goes and anoth… Compton Gage
“ What will he then do unto his name whereby we are called? ...of these things have I asked. Compton Gage
“ As thou hast said unto thy servant, that thou, which gives life to all, hast given life at once to the creature that thou hast created, and the creature bare it: even so it might now also bear them th… Compton Gage
“ Hear me, and I will instruct thee; hearken to the thing that I say, and I shall tell thee more. Compton Gage
“ I have funny bones. If there's ever any kind of tension, I'll always be the one to try and be funny to loosen things up. Matt LeBlanc
“ It's painful for me to watch someone who isn't funny. It's horrifying to sit in the back and watch some guy who just totally sucks. Joe Rogan
“ In a funny way, poems are suited to modern life. They're short, they're intense. Nobody has time to read a 700-page book. People read magazines, and a poem takes less time than an article. Caroline Kennedy
“ When I was a little kid, I wrote this play about all these characters living in a haunted house. There was a witch who lived there, and a mummy. When they were all hassling him, this guy who bought th… Mindy Kaling
“ I saw 28 Days. I don't remember rehab being like a day camp or being that funny. Rehab is a dumping ground. It's a big landfill. Charlie Sheen
“ Here in Hollywood you can actually get a marriage license printed on an Etch-A-Sketch. Dennis Miller
