Top Satire Quotes

If we had to earn our age by thinking for ourselves at least once a year, only a handful of people would reach adulthood.

One of the main functions of a push-up bra is to lower the number of mothers who seem like mothers.

Satire Definition

(a.) A composition, generally poetical, holding up vice or folly to reprobation; a keen or severe exposure of what in public or private morals deserves rebuke; an invective poem; as, the Satires of Juvenal.

(a.) Keeness and severity of remark; caustic exposure to reprobation; trenchant wit; sarcasm.

Most priests wish they were as righteous as they seem to most members of their congregations.

Death would not surprise us as often as it does, if we let go of the misbelief that newborns are less mortal than the elderly.

Looking but not seeing is the hearing but not understanding of the eye.

Nothing is as irritating to a shy man as a confident girl.

Some people avoid thinking deeply in public, only because they are afraid of coming across as suicidal.

Millions of sane people would each be sexually attracted to their own parent or child if they were not related to them.

Some people hate people who are overconfident, only because their overconfidence reminds them of their underconfidence.

We love being mentally strong, but we hate situations that allow us to put our mental strength to good use.

We seldom learn much from someone with whom we agree.

With regard to things such as independence, mental capabilities, and sexuality, a very old man is nothing but a gigantic infant with white hair and wrinkles.

You are more likely to find three TVs inside a randomly selected house than you are to find a single book that is or was not read to pass an exam, to please God, or to be a better cook.

To evade insanity and depression, we unconsciously limit the number of people toward whom we are sincerely sympathetic.

Some men are so indoctrinated that they sincerely believe that other than cooking and cleaning the only thing that a woman can do better than them is being a woman.

When you are unemployed, weekends are seven days long.

Some writers write to forget. Some forget to write.

A premature death does not only rob one of the countless instances where one would have experienced pleasure, it also saves one from the innumerable instances where one would have experienced pain.

Most women would each be left with fewer dreams or without a dream, if the institution of marriage were to be abolished.

Making God a man is the consolation prize that our forefathers gave themselves for not being the ones who were each blessed with a vagina.