Top Humorous Quotes

Most men would no longer enjoy conversing with most women if they stopped bringing their vaginas along.

Be calm when your wife yells at you, calmer when she chastens you, but be terrified when she ignores you.

Humorous Definition

(a.) Moist; humid; watery.

(a.) Subject to be governed by humor or caprice; irregular; capricious; whimsical.

(a.) Full of humor; jocular; exciting laughter; playful; as, a humorous story or author; a humorous aspect.

Tally really didn't have the strength to explain that she'd really meant her hangover, which was sprawled in her head like an overweight cat, sullen and squishy and disinclined to budge.

One afternoon, when I was four years old, my father came home, and he found me in the living room in front of a roaring fire, which made him very angry. Because we didn't have a fireplace.

Humor is something that thrives between man's aspirations and his limitations. There is more logic in humor than in anything else. Because, you see, humor is truth.

If life takes you long way, take a shortcut!

The only real reason that some relationships and marriages have not yet been ended is because in each case one of the partners has not yet found their ideal partner or someone they love or at least li...

Some people are each holding on to a lover of theirs who no longer loves them and/or who they no longer love, only because they do not want to have a reason or another reason to be jealous of the pers...

Boys are raw materials that women manufacture into products called men.

The adults said the only good food was the bacon, but the kids knew better. They had never had a more fun breakfast in their lives. Although they had to agree the bacon was very good. Then again, it w...

50% of all facts are false and the other half are just made up

After a certain point, all natural bodily changes are for the worst.

Jean-Baptiste Say may have coined the term 'entrepreneur' but he totally missed the opportunity to put it on a t-shirt and sell it.

There are times when I am so unlike myself that I might be taken for someone else of an entirely opposite character.

Nothing can enslaved us, if we free in our minds.

As a reformed procrastinator, I'm now getting things done in the first 10 seconds of the last minute.

There was only one thing about his own appearance which really pleased Hercule Poirot, and that was the profusion of his moustaches, and the way they responded to grooming and treatment and trimming....

Never call anyone a baboon unless you are sure of your facts.

You do not know the madness of scholarly curiosity, Mr Webster. To be interested, and at the same time disinterested…

I like stories about supervillains. They teach children that you can accomplish great things even when the whole world is against you.