The chicken does not exist only in order to produce another egg. He may also exist to amuse himself, to praise God, and even to suggest ideas to a French dramatist.
Sober or blotto, this is your motto: keep muddling through.
She sighed and leaned her cheek against his shoulder. How comfortable this is! she said. And so delightfully vulgar! Does plain Mr Dash put his arm round ladies in hackney coaches?When not in gaol he...
My shining dishonesty will be the salvation of me.
Fifteen minutes later, Justin looks at his pint of blood with pride. He doesn't want it to go to some stranger, he almost wants to bring it to the hospital himself, survey the wards and present it to...
Excuse me, your attention please. He waited until the whole floor had stopped what it was doing and turned to face him. For a split second his impulse control kicked in, but by then his mouth was full...
Ethan Wyeth: I hope you're thirsty.
He deserves paradise who makes his companions laugh.
Look at Jewish history. Unrelieved lamenting would be intolerable. So for every ten Jews beating their breasts God designated one to be crazy and amuse the breast-beaters. By the time I was five I k...
We were sent to Afghanistan to carry out hugely dangerous missions. But we were also told that we could not shoot that camel drover before he blew up all of us, because he might be an unarmed civilian...
The codfish lays ten thousand eggs.The homely hen lays one.Codfish never cackles to tell you what she has done.And so we scorn the codfish,while the humble hen we prize,which only goes to show you tha...
Failure is something you experience on your way to success - unless you're a skydiver.
Focke's razor: Never attribute to plot holes that which is adequately explained by miracles.
Summer is the time when it is too hot to do the job that it was too cold to do last winter.
It was almost noon when the plane touched down at the Triad airport on the outskirts of Greensboro. There was a hire car waiting for me; I waved my notepad at the dashboard to transmit my profile, the...
My cats inspire me daily. They inspire me to get a dog!
Maxim 29: The enemy of my enemy is my enemy's enemy. No more. No less.-The Seventy Maxims of Maximally Effective Mercenaries
Oh, measure it all out! Acceptable levels of misery and suffering!' The cane swung down, thumped hard on the ground. 'Acceptable? Who the fuck says any level is acceptable? What sort of mind thinks th...
Delia Smith needs to realise that when Nigella flirts with the camera she comes across as a slut. When Delia does it she comes across as an old slut.
But we all had an agreement to let each other get away with everything! That's Capitalism!