Top Humorous Quotes

We would not be ashamed of doing some of the things we do in private, if the number of sane human beings who do them in public were large enough.

Chuck Norris can divide by zero.

Humorous Definition

(a.) Moist; humid; watery.

(a.) Subject to be governed by humor or caprice; irregular; capricious; whimsical.

(a.) Full of humor; jocular; exciting laughter; playful; as, a humorous story or author; a humorous aspect.

Saying that you do not remember something or someone is a less embarrassing or hurtful way of saying that you do not know it or them anymore.

Some people wish they were as happy as or happy like some people think they are.

The dimple in his left cheek was ironic-it gave the impression that he was sweet as a cupcake. (Dark City Lights)

Some men would not still be HIV negative or alive, if they had managed to sleep with some of the women with whom they want or wanted to have sex.

There probably was a time when the idea of having a toilet inside a house was repulsive.

A secretary must think like a man act like a lady look like a girl and work like a dog.

Most human beings would have never been pained by the death of a human being if they had never seen a human being or pretending to be pained by that.

We the living are to blame for the painfulness of being dead.

Chuck Norris can unscramble an egg.

The fact that you have just buried your parent or parents and/or sibling or siblings does not make you less likely to die today.

Because he has finally realized that it is it and not him that is loved by the woman he loves, many a man is jealous of his own car, house, wardrobe, or salary.

We have glorified wealth and freedom so much that it is impossible for most of us to truly believe that a man can truly be happy in a shack or within the confines of a prison cell.

In some cases, you can tell how somebody is being treated by their own boss from the way they are treating someone to whom they are a boss.

Not everything that is seen is visible.

I check every can of Barbasol I buy for dinosaur embryos. I haven't found any yet, as evidenced by the lack of T-Rex screams in my apartment.

For some, the left testicle is larger than the right one. For Chuck Norris, each testicle is larger than the other one.

If you call yourself an "authoress" on your Facebook profile, you suck at life. You are stupid and your children are ugly. It doesn't matter if you're just trying to be cute and original. You're not....

Noseless and Handless, the Lannister Boys.