When Chuck Norris calls 911 it's to ask if everything is ok.
Chuck Norris can unscramble an egg.
Chuck Norris can divide by zero.
Chuck Norris will never have a heart attack. His heart isn't nearly foolish enough to attack him.
For some, the left testicle is larger than the right one. For Chuck Norris, each testicle is larger than the other one.
Chuck Norris is the only human being to display the Heisenberg uncertainty principle -- you can never know both exactly where and how quickly he will roundhouse kick you in the face.