Thank you for sending me a copy of your book. I'll waste no time reading it.
She runs the gamut of emotions from A to B.
A lady came up to me one day and said 'Sir! You are drunk', to which I replied 'I am drunk today madam, and tomorrow I shall be sober but you will still be ugly.
Beauty is only skin deep, but ugly goes clean to the bone.
I did not attend his funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.
He had just about enough intelligence to open his mouth when he wanted to eat, but certainly no more.
An old battleax of a woman said to Winston Churchill, "If you were my husband I would put poison in your tea." Churchill's response, "Ma'am if you were my wife I would drink it.