All I know is just what I read in the papers, and that's an alibi for my ignorance.
It's a good thing we don't get all the government we pay for.
The best way out of a difficulty is through it.
Ancient Rome declined because it had a Senate, now what's going to happen to us with both a House and a Senate?
Even if you're on the right track you'll get run over if you just sit there.
I don't make jokes. I just watch the government and report the facts.
You've got to go out on a limb sometimes because that's where the fruit is.
Never miss a good chance to shut up.
Take the diplomacy out of war and the thing would fall flat in a week.
People are getting smarter nowadays they are letting lawyers, instead of their conscience, be their guide.
This country has come to feel the same when Congress is in session as when the baby gets hold of a hammer.
I am not a member of any organized political party. I am a Democrat.
When I die, I want to die like my grandfather who died peacefully in his sleep. Not screaming like all the passengers in his car.
Too many people spend money they haven't earned, to buy things they don't want, to impress people that they don't like.
There are three kinds of men. The one that learns by reading. The few who learn by observation. The rest of them have to pee on the electric fence for themselves.
Things in our country run in spite of government, not by aid of it.
An ignorant person is one who doesn't know what you have just found out.
Everybody is ignorant only on different subjects.
Make crime pay. Become a lawyer.
We don't seem to be able to check crime, so why not legalize it and then tax it out of business?