If advertisers spent the same amount of money on improving their products as they do on advertising then they wouldn't have to advertise them.
An economist's guess is liable to be as good as anybody else's.
You know, everybody's ignorant, just on different subjects.
I don't know what humor is.
If I studied all my life, I couldn't think up half the number of funny things passed in one session of congress.
We are all here for a spell, get all the good laughs you can.
There's only one thing that can kill the movies, and that's education.
I have a scheme for stopping war. It's this - no nation is allowed to enter a war till they have paid for the last one.
Lord, the money we do spend on Government and it's not one bit better than the government we got for one-third the money twenty years ago.
The worst thing that happens to you may be the best thing for you if you don't let it get the best of you.
A remark generally hurts in proportion to its truth.
A fool and his money are soon elected.
Everything is funny, as long as it's happening to somebody else.
Everything is funny as long as it is happening to somebody else.
I guess there is nothing that will get your mind off everything like golf. I have never been depressed enough to take up the game, but they say you get so sore at yourself you forget to hate your enem...
Don't gamble take all your savings and buy some good stock and hold it till it goes up, then sell it. If it don't go up, don't buy it.
Politics has become so expensive that it takes a lot of money even to be defeated.
If there are no dogs in Heaven, then when I die I want to go where they went.
It's a good thing we don't get all the government we pay for.
Good judgment comes from experience, and a lot of that comes from bad judgment.