Tomorrow Loophole: As part of my investigation of First Steps, I’d identified tomorrow logic. Now doesn’t matter, because we’re going to follow good habits tomorrow.
Two kinds of clarity support habit formation: clarity of values and clarity of action. The clearer I am about what I value, and what action I expect from myself—not what other people value, or expect...
UPHOLDER/Obligers must be sure to articulate inner expectations and to create boundaries to protect inner expectations from outer interference.
Unlike a reward, which must be earned or justified, a treat is a small pleasure or indulgence that we give to ourselves just because we want it.
Upholders may struggle in situations where expectations aren't clear or the rules aren't established. They may feel compelled to meet expectations, even ones that seem pointless. They may feel uneasy...
Upholders respond readily to both outer expectations and inner expectations. Questioners question all expectations, and will meet an expectation only if they believe it’s justified. Obligers respond r...
Upholders-tipped-to-Obligers have a commitment to both inner and outer expectations, for them, the pull of outer expectations is very hard to ignore; UPHOLDER/Obligers must be sure to articulate inner...
W. H. Auden articulated this tension beautifully: Between the ages of twenty and forty we are engaged in the process of discovering who we are, which involves learning the difference between accidenta...
Waldenlust. This longing takes several forms: fantasies of the freedom that dispossession would bring; nostalgia for earlier, supposedly simpler times; and reverence for the primitive, which is assume...
Walking had an added benefit: it helped me to think. Nietzsche wrote, All truly great thoughts are conceived while walking, and his observation is backed up by science; exercise-induced brain chemical...
We all know the secret of dieting—eat better, eat less, exercise more—it’s the application that’s challenging. I had to create a scheme to put happiness ideas into practice in my life.
What I Value What’s most satisfying to me: saving time, or money, or effort? Does it bother me to act differently from other people, or do I get a charge out of it? Do I spend a lot of time on somethi...
What I do most days matters more than what I do once in a while. That kind of self-encouragement is a greater safeguard than self-blame.
What am I waiting for? What would I do if I weren’t scared? What steps would make things easier? What would I do if I had all the time and money in the world? If I were looking back at...
What saves a man is to take a step. Then another step. It is always the same step, but you have to take it. —Antoine de Saint-Exupéry, Wind, Sand and Stars
Whatever liberates our spirit without giving us mastery over ourselves is destructive. And whatever liberates our spirit while giving us mastery over ourselves is constructive.
When Churchill was running for office for the first time, he went door to door to ask for votes. He knocked on the door of an irritable man who, when Churchill introduced himself, said, Vote for you?...
When Obligers have the external accountability they need to meet their inner expectations, they don’t experience any sense of limitation or self-frustration—and of course many environments, such as th...
When deciding what to buy, remember that some things are easy to buy—but then we have to them. If they're not used, they don't enhance our lives; they just contribute to guilt and clutter.
When it comes to fake food, I’m like Samuel Johnson, who remarked, Abstinence is as easy to me as temperance would be difficult. In other words, I can give something up altogether, but I can’t indulge...
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