The Bible says that it’s all right to cast the first stone if someone dead is telling you to do it
I go to the movies at least five times a week, and after a while everything becomes a blur to me.
Didn’t need a fifteen-minute conversation, just some human interaction. It can be had, and easily: a gesture, a joke, something that says, I live in this world too.
A good [short story] would take me out of myself and then stuff me back in, outsized, now, and uneasy with the fit.
She’d never expressed any great interest in the outdoors, so I scattered her remains on the carpet and then vacuumed her back up.
In the role of Mary, six-year-old Shannon Burke just barely manages to pass herself off as a virgin.
Your trash. You’re trash. Your family’s trash.
A lot of our outlawed terms were invented by black people and then picked up by whites, who held on to them way past their expiration date. 'My bad,' for example, and 'I've got your back' and 'You go,...
My mother was, for the most part, delighted with my brother and regarded him with the bemused curiosity of a brood hen discovering she has hatched a completely different species. 'I think it was very...
Oh, for Christ's sake,' I hear. 'Can we please just try to have a good time?' This is like ordering someone to find you attractive, and it doesn't work. I've tried it.
As I searched the atlas for somewhere to run to, Hugh made a case for his old stomping grounds. His first suggestion was Beirut, where he went to nursery school. His family left there in the midsixtie...
In France the most often used word is connerie, which means bullshit, and in America it’s hands-down awesome, which has replaced incredible, good, and even just OK. Pretty much everything that isn’t t...
Shopping has nothing to do with money. If you have it, you go to stores and galleries, and if not, you haunt flea markets or Goodwills.
Today the teacher told us that a ripe Camembert should have the same consistency as a human eyebrow.
Walking twenty-five miles, or even running up the stairs and back, suddenly seemed pointless, since without the steps being counted and registered, what use were they?
In the beginning, I was put off by the harshness of German. Someone would order a piece of cake, and it sounded as if it were an actual order, like, 'Cut the cake and lie facedown in that ditch betwee...
Kools and Newports were for black people and lower-class whites. Camels were for procrastinators, those who wrote bad poetry, and those who put off writing bad poetry. Merits were for sex addicts, Sal...
What's the trick to remembering that a sandwich is masculine? What qualities does it share with anyone in possession of a penis? I'll tell myself that a sandwich is masculine because if left alone for...
Movie characters might chase each other through the fog or race down the stairs of burning buildings, but that’s for beginners. Real love amounts to withholding the truth, even when you’re offered the...
Randall, the gay alcoholic in the house next door, boldly peeps through my windows. 'Boy, you sure rock in that chair a lot,' he said last week, his face pressed against my screen. This time I was ly...
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