Top George Carlin Quotes

Why should I have to hide the fact that I don't believe there’s a supreme being? There’s no proof of it. There’s no harm in saying you’re an atheist. It doesn't mean you treat people any differently....

He - and if there is a God, I am convinced he is a he, because no woman could or would ever fuck things up this badly.

The IQ and the life expectancy of the average American recently passed each other in opposite directions.

[On school uniforms] Don't these schools do enough damage making all these kids think alike, now they have to make them look alike too? It's not a new idea, either. I first saw it in old newsreels fro...

There are no bad words. Bad thoughts. Bad intentions, and wooooords.

Don't give your money to the church. They should be giving their money to you.