One day about a month ago, I really hit bottom. You know, I just felt that in a Godless universe, I didn't want to go on living. Now I happen to own this rifle, which I loaded, believe it or not, and...
Sex is the most fun you can have without laughing.
Is sex dirty? Only when it's being done right.
Ninety percent of living is just showing up.
I will not eat oysters. I want my food dead. Not sick. Not wounded. Dead.
Showing up is 80 percent of life.
The worst that you can say about him (God) is that basically he's an underachiever.
I don't want to achieve immortality through my work. I want to achieve immortality through not dying.
Because it's much more pleasant to be obsessed over how the hero gets out of his predicament than it is over how I get out of mine.
To love is to suffer. To avoid suffering one must not love. But then one suffers from not loving. Therefore, to love is to suffer; not to love is to suffer; to suffer is to suffer. To be happy is to l...
Life doesn't imitate art, it imitates bad television.
One must have one's delusions to live. If you look at life too honestly and clearly, life becomes unbearable because it's a pretty grim enterprise, you will admit.
I did not marry the first girl that I fell in love with, because there was a tremendous religious conflict, at the time. She was an atheist, and I was an agnostic.
To you I'm an atheist to God, I'm the Loyal Opposition.
If only God would give me some clear sign! Like making a large deposit in my name at a Swiss bank.
Why not? Life is short, life is dull, life is full of pain - and this is a chance for something special.
I broke up with this girl, and they put me with a psychiatrist who said, 'Why did you get so depressed, and do all those things you did?' I said, 'I wanted this girl and she left me.'And he said,'Well...
David: And you think it can just evaporate? Even if at one time they loved one another?Marx: That's one of the sad truths of existence. Nothing in this world is permanent. Even the characters created...
If there is reincarnation I'd like to come back as Warren Beatty's fingertips.
Another good thing about being poor is that when you are seventy your children will not have you declared legally insane in order to gain control of your estate.