I’ll go with you, Lula said. Maybe I’ll get a look at the killer Chihuahuas. And besides, I want to ride in Ranger’s Porsche.
It was a Geek Squad badge from Best Buy.
It has been my experience that the only normal people are those you don’t know very well.
If this was the shortcut, she didn’t want to see the longcut.
If I could just get Broom to cooperate, we could fly, Glo said. Then we wouldn't have to worry about traffic. Harry Potter didn't have to worry about traffic.You relize Harry Potter isn't real, right?...
I'll take a donut over a man any day of the week.
I wasn't dating anyone. I was fornicating with Batman.
I walked him to the door. Is there anything else you want me to do? Check your mail? Water your plants? My mail is being forwarded to my lawyer. And I’m watering my own plants. So, you feel safe in th...
I took a shower and spent some time on my hair, doing the blow-drying thing, adding some gel and some spray. When I was done I looked like Cher on a bad day. Still, Cher on a bad day wasn’t all that b...
I might be a stay-at-home mother someday, but I’ll always be trying to fly off the garage roof. That’s just who I am.
I have people trying to kill me. A giraffe is low on my list of disturbances.
I had a long history of calamitous mishaps.
He’s a serious babe, Connie said. Saw him six months ago, before all this happened. He was ordering a quarter pound of provolone at the meat market, and I had all I could do to keep from sinking my te...
Every time I get social with you I end up all by myself, naked, in the middle of the street.I rolled my eyes. That only happened once…and you weren’t naked. You were wearing socks and a shirt.I was sp...
Besides, there's nobody who is going to watch your back better than me. You know that. And that's why I'm going to be there with you, whenever there is, whenever you ask, and as long as I'm able, he s...
As I ran water to wash my hands, my earbud fell out of my ear and went down the drain.Crap!I hauled my cellphone out of my bag and texted Ranger. , he textd back.
And from where I was sitting his ass looked like little Bear's bed...not too hard, and not too soft, but just right.
Then I had to decide if I needed to wear shoes that kicked ass or were good for ass kicking, on account of there's a difference you know. ~ Finger Lickin' Fifteen
Years old and widowed. No children. He’d sold his insurance business
Do it with the bandaged hand, so he had the