Because you love me, I said, sounding smug.More like you grew on me, he said. Like fungus.
Because sometimes it's about letting go of what your mind tells you and following what your heart shows you instead. That's how you know it will always be real.
AND HE was just so amazing, I said as I braided Gary’s hair. Like so selfless and awesome and he smelled like leaves and I think his eyebrows should be declared a treasure of the Kingdom.
'The image of you putting a condom on a banana to teach me about gay sex is forever ingrained in my head.' 'Well, a good father teaches his son about the facts of life.' 'You didn't have to put the ba...
–¡Mamá! Mamá, ¡tienes que olfatearlo! Es como… como… ¡Ni siquiera lo sé! Estaba caminando en el bosque para ver los límites de nuestro territorio así podría ser como papá y luego estaba como… guau. Lu...
Anyone that gave them shit for anything would find a drag queen’s spiked heel up their urethra.
And every time I saw him in the hall, I couldn’t help but think, There goes Captain Hook,
You know you live in America when people can hate who you love, but then can turn around and hug a damn racist. Fuck them. You go out and show them just how stupid they are.
Why do I need to be defined as anything? Why can’t I just be who I am without some asshole trying to make me into something I’m not?
We’re going after her, aren’t we? Eventually. He wasn’t talking about Elijah. Yeah. We are. You going to be okay with that? He didn’t hesitate. This is my home. This is my pack. I’ll do whatever it ta...
Well. I guess it’s… it’s the moment, you know, when you wake up first in the morning. You open your eyes and your thoughts are muddled. You’re still partly asleep and you’re warm and don’t want to mov...
They make no sense whatsoever.That's because we're amazing.That's what I mean.Shh, he said. Shh. Its okay. I heard what you didn't say. I got you. Your mouth is saying no, but your body is saying yes...
There’s too many other people in the world who want nothing more than to kick you when you’re down. Don’t you dare do that job for them.
Then Rico said, Okay, like. No offense, papi. You know I love you. Bros for life, and all that. But did you go a little nuts in your head from the mystical moon magic? Because it seems like you went a...
The unicorn stared at him. Then, Gary. Your name is Gary, Sam said. Yes. Ah. That’s… not very unicorn-like. Gary scowled. And what is unicorn-like? Sam shrugged. I don’t know. Like Princess Moon Cloud...
The second message is one that I have saved for weeks. It’s Otter, and he simply says, I love you.
The ass to end all asses, I said, unable to stop myself. The Holy Grail of asses. If we lived in a world with fairies and elves, there would be epic quests to go get that ass. I wanted to bite it.
Paul? Yeah? Don’t take this the wrong way. I tried not to flinch. Here it comes. Vince sighed. I think I’m going to fall in love with you.
Okay, you need to point those freaky eyes at someone else, Miss Thang. I don't need your creepy hoodoo business all up in my shit.I think they're hot, Ryan whispered to me. I know, I said. But you're...
Okay, okay. So. First things first. Aaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhh! Second thing: I should probably say thank you for saving my life. Say it and then follow it up with something funny like… okay. Spinach joke....