Stephen R. Covey Quote

At one seminar where I was speaking on the concept of proactivity, a man came up and said, Stephen, I like what you’re saying. But every situation is so different. Look at my marriage. I’m really worried. My wife and I just don’t have the same feelings for each other we used to have. I guess I just don’t love her anymore and she doesn’t love me. What can I do? The feeling isn’t there anymore? I asked. That’s right, he reaffirmed. And we have three children we’re really concerned about. What do you suggest? Love her, I replied. I told you, the feeling just isn’t there anymore. Love her. You don’t understand. The feeling of love just isn’t there. Then love her. If the feeling isn’t there, that’s a good reason to love her. But how do you love when you don’t love? My friend, love is a verb. Love—the feeling—is a fruit of love, the verb. So love her. Serve her. Sacrifice. Listen to her. Empathize. Appreciate. Affirm her. Are you willing to do that? *** In the great literature of all progressive societies, love is a verb. Reactive people make it a feeling.