One bliss for which there is no match is when you itch to up and scratch.
I hope my tongue in prune juice smothers, If I belittle dogs and mothers.
Certainly there are things in life that money can't buy, but it's very funny - Did you ever try buying then without money?
In the world of mules there are no rules.
Happiness is having a scratch for every itch.
The trouble with a kitten is that eventually it becomes a cat.
Here's a good rule of thumb Too clever is dumb.
Senescence begins And middle age ends The day your descendants Outnumber your friends.
People who work sitting down get paid more than people who work standing up.
There are people who are very resourceful At being remorseful And who apparently feel that the best way to make friends Is to do something terrible and then make amends.
The bed is a bundle of paradoxes: we go to it with reluctance, yet we quit it with regret; we make up our minds every night to leave it early, but we make up our bodies every morning to keep it late.
Middle age is when you've met so many people that every new person you meet reminds you of someone else.
A family is a unit composed not only of children but of men, women, an occasional animal, and the common cold.
Marriage is the alliance of two people, one of whom never remembers birthdays and the other who never forgets them.
In the world of mulesThere are no rules.
Where there is a monster, there is a miracle.
Parsely is gharsley.
The bed is a bundle of paradoxes: we go to it with reluctance, yet we quit it with regret we make up our minds every night to leave it early, but we make up our bodies every morning to keep it late.
Certainly there are things in life that money can't buy, but it's very funny - Did you ever try buying them without money?
Here lies my past Goodbye I have kissed it Thank you kids I wouldn't have missed it.