Janet Evanovich Quotes

I felt my cell phone buzz, and I looked at the screen. Ranger. Your GPS just went blank, Ranger said when I answered. The car exploded. There was a beat of silence. Rafael won the pool, Ranger said. A...

I figured I'd embellish the truth a little, since the police might not be up on the finer points of bounty hunterism and might not understand about commandeering.

I finished my soup and bread and helped myself to a handful of cookies from the cookie jar, glancing at Morelli, wondering at his lean body. He’d eaten two bowls of soup, half a loaf of bread slathere...

I give people gift cards, Lula said. You could buy them in the supermarket. They’re easy. There’s gift cards for everything from Starbucks to Target and in between. I like them on account of the messa...

I got a body stuck to my windshield! Lula yelled. I can’t drive like this! I can’t get my wipers to work. How am I supposed to drive with a dead guy on my wipers?

I guess that’s where I heard of her. There’s lots of people in that seniors’ club, and I don’t go to the meetings all the time. I can only take so much of old people. If I want to see loose skin I can...

I guessed my mother figured if my father got right down to the task of eating he wouldn’t be so inclined to jump up and strangle my grandmother.

I know what you're thinking, Grandma said into the silence. Do I have anymore bullets in this here gun? Well, with all the confusion, what with being locked up in a refrigerator, I plumb forgot what w...

I ordered a pitcher of beer, Morelli said. Hope that’s okay. It’s perfect. I need it now. Morelli whistled through his teeth, and everyone jumped in the restaurant. He raised his hand and mouthed Beer...

I plunked down on the couch beside him. I don't have any accomplishments of any kind. I'm stupid and boring. I don't have any hobbies. I don't play sports. I don't write poetry. I don't travel to inte...

I pulled into the Grand Union parking lot and drove to the end of the mall where the bank was located. I parked at a safe distance from other cars, exited the BMW, and set the alarm.You want me to sta...

I rented Ghostbusters, my all-time favorite inspirational movie. I picked up some microwave, popcorn, a KitKat, a bag of bite-sized Reese's peanut butter cups, and a box of instant hot chocolate with...

I rolled my eyes so far into the back of my head I saw myself thinking.

I rolled my eyes so far into the top of my head I almost fell over backward.

I rooted through my pocketbook and did a fast paraphernalia inventory. I was carrying defense spray, which was a big no-no in a crowded mall. And I carried a stun gun, which on close examination turne...

I see you looking at my cookies,' my father said to Morelli. 'Don't even think about it. Go get your own cookies.

I sensed a familiar presence behind me. A hand brushed my hair back, and Ranger leaned in to me and kissed me on the nape of my neck.

I set the box of biscuits on the counter and went to the bathroom, and when I returned the biscuits were gone. Only a slobbery, mangled corner of the box remained.

I slipped the acres of pink taffeta over my head and struggled to get it zipped. What had originally been a dress from the Little House on the Prairie collection was now straight out of the Little Who...

I swear, you're a crazy person. You go around up to your eyeballs in snakes and dead people and exploding beavers. It's just not normal. Even when I was a 'ho, my life wasn't that freaky.