Janet Evanovich Quotes

Office. Freaking glorious. I hefted my bag higher on my shoulder and I headed out. Tank was standing guard on the sidewalk, in front of my car. I have a couple FTAs, I said to Tank. One’s in the Burg...

I make lots of mistakes. I try hard not to make the same mistake more than three or four times.

Was chilling and eerily invasive. It tied the flowers

Opened in 1874.

I was pretty sure this time Babe meant I was giving him a cramp in his sphincter.

I wasn't dating anyone. I was fornicating with Batman.

This isn't just a job. This is a service profession. We uphold the law, babe.Ranger

I was watching television and I saw how you stick your fingers in a person's eyes to slow them down.Grandma Mazur

There was only one way I could see managing this. I got out, ran around the car, opened his door, and straddled him with one leg outside and one foot on the console. Beeeeeep! My ass was on the horn....

You made the paper again, Grandma said. And the phone's been ringing off the hook. Your mother's in the kitchen, ironing.My mother always irons during times of disaster. Some people drink, some take d...

You have a lot of nerve pulling the gratitude card on me after all I’ve done for you.

You know nothing. You’re nothing but a skank-ass, pencil-dick hemorrhoid. And you smell like anal leakage. Say what?

You have a gun! Why didn’t you use it on Ramirez? Jesus, you hit him with your pocketbook like some sissy girl.

Are you sure you don't know where Jimmy is hiding?''Maybe I'll remember if you show me your tits.''That's disgusting. This is a viewing. There's a dead woman in there.''How about if I asked to see the...

Did you happen to hear anything about me this afternoon? Just how you got thrown off the bridge and Ranger jumped in to save you. Does Mom know? Yeah. She ironed sheets for three hours, mumbling about...

Did the little girl witness a murder? No. She stole a medal that was worth a suitcase full of money. Ranger raised his eyebrows and grinned. Good for her. I like to see enterprise in kids.

He smiled when he saw me . . . and it was the nice smile that included his eyes.

He squinted at me. What are you wearing? Is that some new form of birth control?

No one expected a first year engineering student to build the perfect bridge.

OKAY, SO HERE’S the thing. My mother’s worst fear has come true. I’m a nymphomaniac. I lust after a lot of men. Of course, maybe that’s because I don’t actually actually have sex with any. And some of...