If you're going to America, bring your own food.
Great people talk about ideas, average people talk about things, and small people talk about wine.
Life is something that happens when you can't get to sleep.
Humility is no substitute for a good personality.
Contrary to popular opinion, the hustle is not a new dance step - it is an old business procedure.
My desire to curtail undue freedom of speech extends only to such public areas as restaurants, airports, streets, hotel lobbies, parks, and department stores. Verbal exchanges between consenting adult...
I must take issue with the term 'a mere child,' for it has been my invariable experience that the company of a mere child is infinitely preferable to that of a mere adult.
Ask your child what he wants for dinner only if he is buying.
Very few people possess true artistic ability. It is therefore both unseemly and unproductive to irritate the situation by making an effort. If you have a burning, restless urge to write or paint, sim...
Chocolate is an excellent flavor for ice cream but both unreasonable and disconcerting in chewing gum.
I prefer dead writers because you don't run into them at parties.
When you leave New York, you are astonished at how clean the rest of the world is. Clean is not enough.
The opposite of talking isn't listening. The opposite of talking is waiting.
There's no equivalent to Mozart in writing.
The best fame is a writer's fame. It's enough to get a table at a good restaurant, but not enough to get you interrupted when you eat.
You can't go around hoping that most people have sterling moral characters. The most you can hope for is that people will pretend that they do.
Ask your child what he wants for dinner only if he's buying.
The opposite of talking is not listening. The opposite of talking is waiting.
There is no such thing as inner peace. There is only nervousness and death.
All God's children are not beautiful. Most of God's children are, in fact, barely presentable.