If there was anything I learned from John the Baptist, it was that the sooner you confess a mistake, the quicker you can get on to making new and better mistakes.
For the tourist, immersed in the oblivion of vacation spending, Cypress Street provided a bonanza of curious gifts to prove to the folks back home that they had been somewhere. Somewhere where they ha...
Voilà! said the artist, in perfect fucking French.
Matthew?
Know what I like about mysteries? They’re mysterious.
It’s sarcasm, Josh.Sarcasm?It’s from the Greek, sarkasmos. To bite the lips. It means that you aren’t really saying what you mean, but people will get your point. I invented it, Bartholomew named it.W...
Is it so hard for you to give up what you never had?
I think there was always some scrawny dreamer sitting at the edge of the firelight, who had the ability to imagine dangers, to look into the future in his imagination and see possibilities, and theref...
You're trying to be tricky. What's morality?""It's the difference between what's right and what you can rationalize.""Must be a human thing.""Exactly.
[Abby to Tommy and Jody who are hugging]So I'm like, Cold-faced killers on the clock, bitches, we don't have time for your bonery right now.--The Chronicles of Abby Normal
So künde, o Muse, dein KlagenVon Trauer, Krieg und Tücke,Von verlogener Liebesmüh’ und Liederlichstem Rumgeficke …
One day I was telling him that I thought that cars had replaced guns as phallic symbols for American men, and I thought it was interesting that he had one that was so small and fast. The next day he g...
If you think anyone is sane you just don't know enough about them.
Ydych chi'n cymryd cerdynnau credid? said the highwayman, no doubt trying to frighten me further, his consonants chained like anal beads strung out of hell's own bunghole.
Why understand when you can believe?
Then someone started pounding on the door. And not a little Hey, what's up? pound. Like there was a big sale on door pounds down at the Pound Outlet. Buy one, get one free at Pounds-n-Stuff.--Being th...
Soon a whole guild of low-priced shrine keepers around Europe named their own pope - Boldface the Relatively Shameless, Discount Pope of Prague. The price war was on [...] The Retail Pope would offer...
She can be a whirlwind of tits and terror when she puts her mind to a purpose, can't she, sir?
Scratch a cynic and you will find a disappointed romantic.
In another Christmas story, Dale Pearson, evil developer, self-absorbed woman hater, and seemingly unredeemable curmudgeon, might be visited in the night by a series of ghosts who, by showing him blea...