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Ada Calhoun Quote

To love somebody is not just a strong feeling -- it is a decision, it is a judgment, it is a promise, writes psychologist Erich Fromm. If love were only a feeling, there would be no basis for the promise to love each other forever. A feeling comes and it may go. How can I judge that it will stay forever, when my act does not involve judgment and decision?

Ada Calhoun

To love somebody is not just a strong feeling -- it is a decision, it is a judgment, it is a promise, writes psychologist Erich Fromm. If love were only a feeling, there would be no basis for the promise to love each other forever. A feeling comes and it may go. How can I judge that it will stay forever, when my act does not involve judgment and decision?

Tags: love, marriage, promises

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About Ada Calhoun

Ada Calhoun (born Ada Calhoun Schjeldahl; March 17, 1976) is an American writer. She is the author of St. Marks Is Dead, a history of St. Mark's Place in East Village, Manhattan, New York; Wedding Toasts I’ll Never Give, a book of essays about marriage; Why We Can't Sleep, a book about Generation X women and their struggles; Also a Poet, a memoir about her father and the poet Frank O’Hara, and the forthcoming Crush: A Novel. She has also been a critic, frequently contributing to The New York Times Book Review; a co-author and ghostwriter the New York Times having reported that she collaborated on the 2023 Britney Spears memoir The Woman in Me; and a freelance essayist and reporter. A Village Voice profile in 2015 said: "Her CV can seem as though it were cobbled together from the résumés of three ambitious journalists."