Desires occur because pratyakhyan [resolutions to not repeat the mistake] were not done. It comes in the memory because pratikraman [repentances] were not done.
When you see the members of your household as faultless (nirdosh) and see only your own faults, then true pratikraman will be done.
When you do pratikraman after conflict, the conflict is erased. When you give rise to new conflicts, the energies that had arisen will disappear again.