Top Comics Quotes

MOMB - noun - One who can deal with all of the INSANITY of being a MOM... Because she's the BOMB!

I try not to speak to critics. It only encourages them.-Snagglepuss

Son, in life you do not fight battles because you expect to win......you fight them merely because they need to be fought.-Snagglepuss

Dance like you're stamping on a human face forever, love like you've been in a serious car crash that minced the front of your brain, stab like no one can arrest you, and live like there's no such thi...

The world isn't fair, Calvin.I know Dad, but why isn't it ever unfair in my favor?

So where'd you park the car, Max?''I don't know. I couldn't see over the wheel.''That's okay. I think I can smell it.

You have a valid complaint, and I do recognize it ... but you are reading into things a little bit. Just the same, I will do my best to make horrible things happen to a bunch of white people before so...

Marion: What is all this? What's going on?Clint: The same thing that's always going on. The end of the world.

They are not grey roots! This is my new fifty shades of grey OMBRE hairstyle!

The world is on fire, young man. As writers, it is only proper that we do what we can to warn people.But in telling the truth to the world, don't lie to yourself. Write whatever you want. Tell the tru...

I am willing to make people uncomfortable so that my daughter doesn't have to!

Socrates should have written comics.

I offer you a fable for our times...A magic box sits in your pocket with all the knowledge and music and entertainment of the world contained within it. If you opened this box and looked down into it....

All those years I thought that it was power that brought responsibility. It's not. I was wrong.It's responsibility that brings power. It's knowing what needs to be done that brings strength. And coura...

Did you ever want to set someone's head on fire, just to see what it looked like? Did you ever stand in the street and think to yourself, I could make that nun go blind just by giving her a kiss? Did...