WAKE UP! WE'RE LATE FOR DRINKING!!
Gotta love alcohol and sex hormones.
Of course, I'm not a doctor; I just watch a lot of ER and House.
No one has it all figured out, especially not the people who are acting like they do and judging you because of it. Pretending to be something you aren't because you're trying to please a bunch of jud...
The devil doesn't come dressed in a red cape and pointy horns. He comes as everything you've ever wished for ...
I try to explain to people that the only way to be cool is to be who you truly are, and the only way to live life is to do the things that you want to do and be the person that you want to be no matte...
She was quite promiscuous, to the point where dating her was similar to the experience of sitting on a warm toilet seat:
Look, I know everything is shitty right now, but if you don't stop acting like such a bitch, someones gonna fuck that pussy on your face.
If you don't have a job right now, and you have a computer and a basic intelligence level, I guarantee you can get a great job, paying really well, in less than three months. How? Learn to program.
Did you hear the nonsensical prattle spewing from her pie-hole?
5:16 I shotgun two beers, piss out the bedroom window, catcall passing girls, burp violently, put cage fighting on tv, play with myself. I feel manly again.
I take a lull from my CamelBak and choke at its potency. It tastes like bad decisions. It's perfect.
I never understand why women think drama and bullshit are attractive to guys. They’re not. I’m going to be real clear about this, ladies, so pay attention: Prince Charming doesn't come to rescue cunty...
Mexico is a lawless place. I don’t care what the UN says, or what the State Department travel advisories tell you. The fact is that Mexico, as a whole, is a narco-state run by powerful regional cartel...
I stop paying attention because as much as I love beauty, I hate stupidity, and seeing the two combined pisses me off.
Girl3 You don't have to be a jerkSlingBlade Quite the contrary, my sloppy penile scholar.Order me another drink and be quick about it.
I wish I could bottle the seductive look she gave me so I could sniff it when I jack off.
I find it truly appalling that there are people in the world like you. You are a disgusting, vile, repulsive, repugnant, foul creature. Because of you, I don't believe in God anymore. No just God woul...
His first question shows how well he knows me: TheRoommate: Did you take any money out of her purse?
There are fun nights, there are crazy nights, and then there are those nights that make men legends.