…We were born vampires.I thought you became –— vampires by being bitten? Dear me, no. Oh, we can turn people into vampires, it’s an easy technique, but what would be the point? When you eat… now what...
Watching a dog try to chew a large piece of toffee is a pastime fit for gods. Mr. Fusspot's mixed ancestry had given him a dexterity of jaw that was truly awesome. He somersaulted happily around the f...
Many things went on at Unseen University and, regrettably, teaching had to be one of them. The faculty had long ago confronted this fact and had perfected various devices for avoiding it. But this was...
If you were going to be successful in the world of crime, you needed a reputation for honesty.
But what's worth more than gold?Practically everything. You, for example. Gold is heavy. Your weight in gold is not very much gold at all. Aren't you worth more than that?
It doesn't stop being magic just because you know how it works.
Stand before your god, bow before your king, kneel before your man.
To animals they were just the weather, just part of everything. But humans arose and gave them names, just as people filled the starry sky with heroes and monsters, because this turned them into stori...
It was a nice day.
The worst thing you can do is nothing.
Rincewind could scream for mercy in nineteen languages, and just scream in another forty-four.
She was convinced that she was anorexic, because every time she looked in the mirror she did indeed see a fat person.
Samuel Vimes dreamed about Clues. He had a jaundiced view of Clues. He instinctively distrusted them. They got in the way. And he distrusted the kind of person who’d take one look at another man and s...
Using a metaphor in front of a man as unimaginative as Ridcully was like ared flag to a bu... was like putting something very annoying in front ofsomeone who was annoyed by it.
First Thoughts are the everyday thoughts. Everyone has those. Second Thoughts are the thoughts you think about the way you think. People who enjoy thinking have those. Third Thoughts are thoughts that...
I don't hold with paddlin' with the occult, said Granny firmly. Once you start paddlin' with the occult you start believing in spirits, and when you start believing in spirits you start believing in d...
Albert grunted. Do you know what happens to lads who ask too many questions?Mort thought for a moment.No, he said eventually, what?There was silence.Then Albert straightened up and said, Damned if I k...
This was not a fairy-tale castle and there was no such thing as a fairy-tale ending, but sometimes you could threaten to kick the handsome prince in the ham-and-eggs.
There's always a story. It's all stories, really. The sun coming up every day is a story. Everything's got a story in it. Change the story, change the world.
Romancin’ is verra important, ye ken. Basically it’s a way the boy can get close to the girl wi’oot her attackin’ him and scratchin’ his eyes oot.
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