What ho, Stinker.’ ‘Hallo, Bertie.’ ‘Long time since we met.’ ‘It is a bit, isn’t it?’ ‘I hear you’re a curate now.’ ‘Yes, that’s right.’ ‘How are the souls?
What are the chances of a cobra biting Harold, Jeeves?Slight, I should imagine, sir. And in such an event, knowing the boy as intimately as I do, my anxiety would be entirely for the snake.
Ukridge was the sort of man who asks you to dinner, borrows money from you to pay the bill, and winds up the evening by embroiling you in a fight with a cabman.
Those who know Bertram Wooster best are aware that he is a man of sudden, strong enthusiasms and that, when in the grip of one of these, he becomes a remorseless machine—tense, absorbed, single-minded...
This Vladimir Brusiloff to whom I have referred was the famous Russian novelist. . . . Vladimir specialized in gray studies of hopeless misery, where nothing happened till page three hundred and eight...
They’re soul mates. She has about as much brain as a retarded billiards ball, and he approximately the same.
There was a sound in the background like a distant sheep coughing gently on a mountainside. Jeeves sailing into action.
The drowsy stillness of the summer afternoon was shattered by what sounded to his strained senses like G.K. Chesterton falling on a sheet of tin.
That's always the way in this world. The chappies you'd like to lend money to won't let you, whereas the chappies you don't want to lend it to will do everything except actually stand you on your head...
Stimulated by the juice, I believe, men have even been known to ride alligators.
Sir Thomas extended three fingers. Jimmy extended two, and the handshake was not a success.
She had turned away and was watching a duck out on the lake. It was tucking into weeds, a thing I've never been able to understand anyone wanting to do. Though I suppose, if you face it squarely, they...
Scotties are smelly, even the best of them. You will recall how my Aunt Agatha’s McIntosh niffed to heaven while enjoying my hospitality. I frequently mentioned it to you.’ ‘Yes, sir.’ ‘And this one i...
One of the Georges - I forget which - once said that a certain number of hours' sleep each night - I cannot recall at the moment how many - made a man something which for the time being has slipped my...
One glance at the girl convinced R. Jones that he had been right. Circumstances had made him a rapid judge of character, for in profession of living by one's wits in a large city, the first principle...
Mr Pett, receiving her cold glance squarely between the eyes, felt as if he were being disembowelled by a clumsy amateur.
Life in the country, with its lack of intellectual stimulus, has caused his natural feebleness of mind to reach a stage which borders closely on insanity. His
Let us say, then, that at some point—five, ten, fifteen, or it may have been twenty minutes later—I became aware of somebody coughing softly at my side like a respectful sheep trying to attract the at...
It is true of course, that I have a will of iron, but it can be switched off if the circumstances seem to demand it.
I was in that painful condition which occurs when one has lost one's first wind and has not yet got one's second.