I have never seen a more sublime demonstration of the totalitarian mind, a mind which might be likened unto a system of gears whose teeth have been filed off at random. Such a snaggle-toothed thought...
I had hoped, as a broadcaster, to be merely ludicrous, but this is a hard world to be ludicrous in, with so many human beings so reluctant to laugh, so incapable of thought, so eager to believe and sn...
And I apologize to all of you who are the same age as my grandchildren. And many of you reading this are the same age as my grandchildren. They, like you, are being royally shafted and lied to by our...
Job left vacant two weeks ago by death—the managership of the Pittsburgh Works. How gay can a party get?
Go shoot a bear. Concentrating hard on the illusion, Paul was able to muster a feeling of positive gratitude for Anita’s presence, to thank God for a woman at his side to help with the petrifying amou...
I didn’t really steal it. I just borrowed it for all eternity
Era gente spregevole, quella di Sodoma e Gomorra, come tutti sanno. Il mondo stava meglio senza di loro. E alla moglie di Lot, naturalmente, fu detto di non voltarsi indietro a guardare il luogo dove...
Do you realize that all great literature is all about what a bummer it is to be a human being? Isn't it such a relief to have somebody say that?
Когда я загнал свой космический корабль в хроно-синкластический инфундибулум, меня мгновенно озарило сознание, что все когда-либо бывшее пребудет вечно. а все, что будет, существовало испокон веков.
Real people don’t make their livings that way any more. Those three romantics out there make as much sense as Marie Antoinette and her milkmaids. When the bankruptcy proceedings begin – in a week, a m...
What makes so many Americans proud of their ignorance? They act as though their ignorance somehow made them charming.
Rented a tent, a tent, a tent; Rented a tent, a tent, a tent. Rented a tent! Rented a tent! Rented a, rented a tent.
It might make me seem more human at this point, which is to say more sympathetic, if I were to declare that I itched and blinked and nearly swooned with a feeling of unreality. Sorry. Not so. I confes...
Be warned: If you allow yourself to see dignity in someone, you have doomed yourself to wanting to understand and help whoever it is.If you see dignity in anything, in fact--it doesn't have to be huma...
Hello babies. Welcome to Earth. It's hot in the summer and cold in the winter. It's round and wet and crowded. On the outside, babies, you've got a hundred years here. There's only one rule that I kno...
My God, what have they done to you? This isn't a man, it's a broken kite.
You cannot be a good writer of serious fiction if you are not depressed.
I don't know about you, but I practice a disorganized religion. I belong to an unholy disorder. We call ourselves "Our Lady of the Perpetual Astonishment
Your planet's immune system is trying to get rid of you.
Я ЖЕРТВА ЦЕПИ НЕСЧАСТНЫХ СЛУЧАЙНОСТЕЙ, КАК И ВСЕ МЫ.