The mourning of a loved one never ends at the funeral. It comes back every so often like a stage performer eager for a curtain call and expects you to be loud about it.
The mad fucker just laughed that insane laugh and pulled his sword out of his ass. Zeus, now afflicted with acute pietism, gasped and asked him to do that again. Jupiter slapped him to to the ground,...
That’s it, Flanagan said, his thick hands gripping the bar and his eyes wide. I’m getting back on the wagon and I’m never getting off again. Oh, Jesus, look at that. I’m looking, Jesus said. Flanagan...
Oberon perked up, Awesome! I've never seen a base model elf before! But they come with bonus dudes?
Normally I laugh at such things, because there is nothing like a fart to lighten up a tense situation.
Leif stared at me, utterly still, the way only vampires and pet rocks can manage.
It's only a slight modification of causality.
It is the whip that clerics use on the laity, making the sheep slaves to whatever moral code the shepherds espouse. It is a catalyst for suicide and untold other acts of selfishness and stupidity.
Ignore that guy, I said, pointing down. He’s always intruding on my conversations and poking his head in where he’s not wanted.
Icy glares from vampires are far icier than icy glares from people. And when the vampire giving you an icy glare is originally from Iceland, you are confronted with the archetypal origin of the term,...
I will tell you, even though you are young and unprepared: Men. are. Shit.
I wanted to say, I’m the Doctor and this is my companion, but I doubted Sophie was a fan of the long-running BBC series. Forget the TARDIS and the sonic screwdriver, the Doctor’s best gadget was the p...
I thought Sundays were supposed to be relaxing. As a male citizen of America, I’m entitled on Sundays to watch athletic men in tight uniforms ritualistically invade one another’s territory, and while...
I think every creature near enough to hear that just pooped Oberon said, And then it went into hiding. Hunting tip number one:Stay Silent.
I sighed. You can go harass the construction workers if you want. I even give you permission to sniff their asses. Oberon stopped panting and pricked up his ears at me. Sure, why not? They’re constru...
I promptly forgot about him and prepared a blend of Creativi-Tea, since I had some fantasy role-players coming in for their weekly dungeon crawl, and the DM always wanted a little something extra to k...
I just shook hands with a naked goddess. What was that she called you? She-ya-han? Does that mean dumbass in Old Irish or something?
I have salted my hatred and cured it, stored it in a dark cellar of my mind against the day when I could let it be my only nourishment. The day is finally come, and I will tear into this meat and savo...
I have noticed over many centuries of relationships that a corollary to love is worry. They sort of come together as a matched set, and it’s nigh impossible to ditch one without the other. I don’t mea...
I gladly shucked off my wet, muddy jeans and put on the new pair. I noticed she hadn't bought me any underwear; Granuaile either didn't think of it or she did think of it and decided that I should go...