“ You killed my father, he snorted in a basso profundo rumble. Prepare to die! Inigo Montoya? Is that you? Kevin Hearne
“ You haven’t lived until you’ve seen an Irish wolfhound parading around in rhinestone-studded gold lamé. Kevin Hearne
“ You have some kind of food in a safe? Is that, uh... safe?Yes. You may relax and depend on my methods of preservation. Kevin Hearne
“ Why don’t high school math teachers ever come up with cool problems like this? If a 150-pound Irish wolfhound launches himself at seventeen miles per hour at a 250-pound draugr, will that dead motherf… Kevin Hearne
“ Whoa! Really? That means practically my whole life is an adventure! I never realized!> Kevin Hearne
“ Where are we going?I don't know yet.Anyplace is good, so long as there's sausage and bitches. Kevin Hearne
“ When you cannot reason with people, you have to try scaring them. If that doesn’t work, then you either run or you kill them. Or set your lawyers on them. Kevin Hearne
“ When a fight comes at ye, it’s not going to ask if you’re in shape for it! Ye have to be ready whenever it comes, and the day I’m not ready for a fight is the day I’m dead! Kevin Hearne
“ We should make a pit trap with spikes in the bottom. You make the pit and I’ll make the spikes. Kevin Hearne
“ Usually I try to suppress any emotions that savor of regret, because they are invariably aperitifs to a main course of depression, and for the long-lived, that’s a recipe for suicide. But that doesn’t… Kevin Hearne
“ Turns out that when you kill a god, people want to talk to you. Paranormal insurance salesmen with special godslayer term life policies. Charlatans with god-proof armor and extraplanar safe houses for… Kevin Hearne
“ There’s a reason Bath & Body Works doesn’t have a line of products called Huge Fucking Squirrel. Kevin Hearne
“ The mourning of a loved one never ends at the funeral. It comes back every so often like a stage performer eager for a curtain call and expects you to be loud about it. Kevin Hearne
“ The mad fucker just laughed that insane laugh and pulled his sword out of his ass. Zeus, now afflicted with acute pietism, gasped and asked him to do that again. Jupiter slapped him to to the ground,… Kevin Hearne
“ That’s it, Flanagan said, his thick hands gripping the bar and his eyes wide. I’m getting back on the wagon and I’m never getting off again. Oh, Jesus, look at that. I’m looking, Jesus said. Flanagan… Kevin Hearne
“ So after I killed him and stowed his body next to the doe, I sampled his smoothie concoction in the parking lot and found it to be quite delicious. Kevin Hearne
“ Of course, I didn’t choose to fail. Failure is rarely a conscious decision and it’s often out of our control, determined by things like physics and circumstance and other people. What we can always co… Kevin Hearne
“ Law is all that separates us from barbarism and the howling within; it is a necessary leash on our darker natures. Kevin Hearne
