Don't put off till tomorrow what can be enjoyed today.
Laughter is the sensation of feeling good all over and showing it principally in one place.
It ain't so much trouble to get rich as it is to tell when we have got rich.
If it wasn't for faith there would be no living in this world we couldn't even eat hash with any safety.
About the most originality that any writer can hope to achieve honestly is to steal with good judgment.
Adversity has the same effect on a man that severe training has on the pugilist: it reduces him to his fighting weight.
Knowledge is like money: the more he gets, the more he craves.
There are lots of people who mistake their imagination for their memory.
Time is like money, the less we have of it to spare the further we make it go.
Honesty is the rarest wealth anyone can possess, and yet all the honesty in the world ain't lawful tender for a loaf of bread.
I haven't got as much money as some folks, but I've got as much impudence as any of them, and that's the next thing to money.
It ain't often that a man's reputation outlasts his money.
One of the best temporary cures for pride and affectation is seasickness a man who wants to vomit never puts on airs.
Money will buy a pretty good dog, but it won't buy the wag of his tail.
There's a lot of people in this world who spend so much time watching their health that they haven't the time to enjoy it.
Flattery is like cologne water, to be smelt of, not swallowed.
It is the little things that fret and worry us you can dodge an elephant but not a fly.
The happiest time in any man's life is when he is in red-hot pursuit of a dollar with a reasonable prospect of overtaking it.
Flattery is like cologne water, to be smelt, not swallowed.
The best medicine I know for rheumatism is to thank the Lord that it ain't gout.
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