Genius ain't anything more than elegant common sense.
Wisdom has never made a bigot, but learning has.
There are two kinds of fools: those who can't change their opinions and those who won't.
A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than you love yourself.
The man whose only pleasure in life is making money, weighs less on the moral scale than an angleworm.
Adversity has the same effect on a man that severe training has on the pugilist: it reduces him to his fighting weight.
I haven't got as much money as some folks, but I've got as much impudence as any of them, and that's the next thing to money.
It ain't often that a man's reputation outlasts his money.
Money will buy a pretty good dog, but it won't buy the wag of his tail.
Most people repent their sins by thanking God they ain't so wicked as their neighbors.
One of the rarest things that a man ever does, is to do the best he can.
Honesty is the rarest wealth anyone can possess, and yet all the honesty in the world ain't lawful tender for a loaf of bread.
The best medicine I know for rheumatism is to thank the Lord that it ain't gout.
Men mourn for what they have lost women for what they ain't got.
One of the best temporary cures for pride and affectation is seasickness a man who wants to vomit never puts on airs.
The best way to convince a fool that he is wrong is to let him have his own way.
In the whole history of the world there is but one thing that money cannot buy...to wit--the wag of a dog's tail.
A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than he loves himself.
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