If you can't stop the bad thoughts from coming to visit, at least you can make fun of them while they're hanging around.
Do not be afraid of what should be afraid of you
It's great that people are basically spending their two weeks of vacation to come out and be with us in some weird part of the world. And I think we owe it to them to take 'em to some cool places.
Just as a cautious businessman avoids investing all his capital in one concern, so wisdom would probably admonish us also not to anticipate all our happiness from one quarter alone.
We demand privacy, yet we glorify those that break into computers.
My mother told me Homer Ditto was not my father. Nope. Mom had had a fling with some other guy who was my dad. Some dude who didn't stick around too long who Mom was happy to get rid of. She chose Hom...
Nothing complements a fast mind better than a slow tongue. And nothing aggravates a slow mind better than a fast tongue.
If you want to brighten up a person's day.Give them a rainbow.
How incessant and great are the ills with which a prolonged old age is replete.
It is still cheating, even if nobody comes.
My belief is that communication is the best way to create strong relationships.