I can’t help it. I’m just a big gasbag. I still got leftover barbecue gas. She squeezed her eyes shut tight and did a full minute-long fart. Excuse me, she said.
I bet, Lula said. If it was me I would have been burning out the motor on my intimate appliances.
I always know it's Sunday because I wake up feeling apologetic. That's one of the cool things about being a Catholic . . . it's a multifaceted experience. If you lose the faith, chances are you'll kee...
Hunh, Lula said. You sure got a stick up your ass. When did you get so play-by-the-book? I’ve always been play-by-the-book. You’re the one who doesn’t play by the book. Well, I knew it was one of us.
His hands still held the windbreaker, his knuckles resting lightly on my breasts. An act of intimate possession more than of sexual aggression.
He’s the Wizard because he’s magic. He mysteriously passes through locked doors. He seems to read minds. He’s able to refuse dessert. And he can give me a hot flash with the touch of a fingertip.
He’d wait. I turned to go into the house and he pulled me back. His hands slid under my shirt and my breath caught. The wire,
Hey, look who’s here! Briggs said. It’s Aunt Stephanie. He was dressed in the tan suit, and it looked like he’d gotten a haircut. What’s with the suit? I asked him. I have a job interview, so Nick let...
Here’s the thing, Riley said. I’m not really into diabolical possibilities. I’m more into logical explanations.
He's a Stone Dead gang member. He'll be hanging with the other Deads, and the Deads own the fifth block of Stark. Their color is purple. Their name is significant. These losers are dead inside. They'v...
He was around the desk in two strides, reaching out for me. I knocked his hand away, grabbed the staple gun, pressed it into his crotch, and bam, bam, bam, bam . . . I stapled his nuts.
He sometimes thought he’d like to become an alcoholic, but he couldn’t afford the liquor.
He slid an arm around me and pulled me to him. I rested my head on his chest, and he nuzzled my hair and kissed me just above the ear.
He exposed himself,' I said. 'Men aren't supposed to go around exposing themselves at unsuspecting women.''Well, technically none of us was unsuspecting,' Grandma said. 'We wait for him to show up. I...
Greeks thought there were four kinds of love. Storge, or familial love. Philia, or friendship. Eros, or romantic love, and agape, or unconditional love.
Grandma has some things in common with the Queen of England. They have the same hairstyle, they each carry their purse in the crook of their arm, and no one tells either of them what to do. Grandma
Grandma has a .45 long barrel that she keeps hidden from my mother. She got it from her friend Elsie, who picked it up at a yard sale. Probably it was in Grandma's purse. Grandma says it gives the bag...
Esistono alcuni uomini che entrano nella vita di una donna e la mandano all'aria per sempre. Joseph Morelli l'ha fatto a me - non per sempre, ma di tanto in tanto.
Do you believe in God? I asked Lula. Fuckin’ A I believe in God. Don’t you believe in God? I believe in something. It’s vague.
Creep I said, cutting to the heart of the matter. - Stephanie Gosh, I wonder who this could be. - MorelliYou lied to me. I knew it too. I knew right from the beginning, you jerk.Silence stretched taut...