Janet Evanovich Quotes

It wasn't my fault.

RANGER WAS DRIVING a black Porsche Carrera. He was wearing black cargo pants,

It's been almost a month since you found a body. I knew you were due.Carl Costanza - Seven Up

My feeling on rain is that it should only occur at night when people are sleeping. At night, rain is cozy. During the day, rain is a pain in the gumpy.

My mother had been slicing up the chicken. She took a drumstick and dropped it on the floor. She kicked it around a little, picked it up and put it on the edge of the plate.There, she said, we'll give...

My mother came into the kitchen. Whose car is that parked in front of our house? That’s Stephanie’s new car, Grandma said. Isn’t it a pip? One of my mother’s eyebrows raised in question. Two new cars?...

He's hot, Lula said, but he's a pig. All men are pigs.Do you really believe that?No but it's a point of view to keep in mind . You don't want to go around thinkin' shit is your fault. Next thing you k...

My grandmother says your grandmother is stalking her.

You have to step on people’s feet and kick them in the back of the leg, Grandma said, then they move away from you.

You're a lunatic. You ran me over with a goddamn Buick.

You would let nine million dollars sit under this concrete?''Yeah.' He toed the concrete. 'I like my floor. The guys did a good job on it. It's nice and smooth.''If we got married and you died, I'd ha...

Are you hungry? Grandma asked me. Do you need breakfast? I’m famished!

My first stop was the supermarket. Not bad this early in the morning because it takes the seniors time to get up and running. By ten, they’d start to roll in, clogging up the lot with their handicap-t...

You shouldn’t be driving, Morelli said to Kloughn. I know, Kloughn said. I tried walking, but I was too drunk. It’s okay. I was driving very slooooowly and ’sponsibly.

Morelli got Briggs a glass. Don’t let the curtains on the windows and the toaster in the kitchen fool you. I’m even less civilized than she is.

Hey, I said, dogs are people, too.

You should see me work my magic in leatherRanger

Hollywood these days. We’ve

Holy bejeezus, Lula said, eyes bugged out, looking at the building. This is scaring the crap out of me. This is like where Dracula would live if he didn’t have any money and was a crack-head. I bet it...

And then I had to decide if I wanted shoes that kicked ass, or were good for ass-kickin', on account of there's a difference.