Janet Evanovich Quotes

I have people trying to kill me. A giraffe is low on my list of disturbances.

This is a little awkward, I said, but my mother just ran over the rabbit.Ran over?As in roadkill. We're not sure what to do about it.Where are you?Giovichinni's, buying lunch meat.And the rabbit?Gone....

In my opinion, the only good spider is a dead spider, and woman's rights aren't worth dick if they mean I can't ask a man to do my bug squashing.

Gold is stored in New York in vaults resting on bedrock, eighty feet below street level. The walls of the vaults are steel-reinforced concrete. The vaults are impenetrable.

When something needs to be ironed I put it in the ironing basket. If a year goes by and the item is still in the basket I throw the item away. This is a good system since eventually I end up only with...

This is the advantage to being an eccentric. Everyone expects you to be eccentric. Emerson

Whoa. Time out. It's been a long, stressful day, but let's not talk crazy.

Respect and love your readers. Write for the reader.

Ranger’s lips swept along my jawline to my ear. I could make you forget the gown.

In a parade, and I’d already seen Ranger naked but he was worth

Ranger was waiting. He was dressed in black slacks, a form-fitting black T-shirt, and a black blazer.

He’d graduated from Dartmouth, so he couldn’t be stupid. Still, she suspected he’d get lost trying to find his way out of a parking lot.

Why would Munch want barium?

If she wasn't your grandmother I'd shoot her.Ranger

Ranger shrugged. Things turn up. He reached behind him and came up with a gun. My gun. Found this in the lobby, too. He tucked the gun under the top edge of my towel, wedging it between my breasts, hi...

If you can’t fool yourself, he said, how can you expect to fool anybody else?

Drawn, eyes wide. Holy Toledo, she said. I called everyone I could think of while I was driving, Sally said.

If this was the shortcut, she didn’t want to see the longcut.

Wondering where Ranger was now, when I needed him. Why wasn’t he here, insisting on locking me up in a safe house? Now that my hamster’s cage was clean, I’d be happy to oblige.

There's me and then there's you, and you aren't ever going to be as good as me, Sweet Thing.Ranger