“ I'm not a movie guy, I'm not a TV sitcom guy, but whatever seems to fit and is funny is good for me. Dave Attell
“ What's the two things they tell you are healthiest to eat? Chicken and fish. You know what you should do? Combine them, eat a penguin. Dave Attell
“ For a long time the people at my shows were sort of the Pantera-tattoo trucker guys, really cool dudes, but I don't know what happened to them. That's the crowd that I like, the ones that don't get so… Dave Attell
“ I have an imagination because my life is so boring that my imagination lets me get off the reality of what's going on. Dave Attell
“ You know, men and women are a lot alike in certain situations. Like when they're both on fire - they're exactly alike. Dave Attell
