“ Part of the reason forward-thinking media networks like Twitter succeed is because people3 want to believe that every immaterial thing they do is pertinent by default; it’s interesting because it happ… Chuck Klosterman
“ Once people decide they want you to do something, they don’t really care what your qualifications are. However you describe yourself becomes proof that you’re the ideal candidate. This is true in jour… Chuck Klosterman
“ Like so many modern people, my relationship with technology makes no sense whatsoever: It's the most important aspect of my that I hate. Chuck Klosterman
“ Klosterman’s Razor: the philosophical belief that the best hypothesis is the one that reflexively accepts its potential wrongness to begin with. _____________________________ Chuck Klosterman
“ Kareem Abdul-Jabbar and O. J. Simpson have a lot in common. We don’t normally lump them together, because certain key contrasts are tricky — for example, one man is a Muslim intellectual and the other… Chuck Klosterman
“ I always thought the time machine is the device that’s missed most. Without even saying it out loud, that’s the thing people want the most: The ability to take whatever it is that went wrong and fix i… Chuck Klosterman
“ Here is the easiest way to explain the genius of Johnny Cash: Singing from the perspective of a convicted muderer in the song Folsom Prison Blues,: Cash is struck by pangs of regret when he sits in hi… Chuck Klosterman
“ Football allows the intellectual part of my brain to evolve, but it allows the emotional part to remain unchanged. It has a liberal cerebellum and a reactionary heart. And this is all I want from ever… Chuck Klosterman
“ First, you must love yourself. And if you do that convincingly enough, others will love you too much. Chuck Klosterman
“ Everyone who loves pro basketball assumes it's a little fixed. We all think the annual draft lottery is probably rigged, we all accept that the league aggressively wants big market teams to advance de… Chuck Klosterman
“ But here’s the thing: He didn’t get hung. The man climbed on a wooden watercraft and collided with North America by accident. It doesn’t matter what happened afterwards or what his motives were. He fo… Chuck Klosterman
“ Americans have become conditioned to believe the world is a gray place without absolutes; this is because we’re simultaneously cowardly and arrogant. We don’t know the answers, so we assume they must… Chuck Klosterman
“ According to population expert Dr. Paul Ehrlich, we should currently be experiencing a dystopian dreamscape where survivors envy the dead, which seems true only when I look at Twitter. Chuck Klosterman
“ A homeless man once told me that dancing to rap music is the cultural equivalent of masturbating, and I'd sort of fell the same way about playing John Madden Football immediately after filing my incom… Chuck Klosterman
“ What music means is almost completely dependent on the people who sell it and the people who buy it, not the people who make it. Our greatest artists are the ones who understand how they can be intere… Chuck Klosterman
“ We are remembered for the totality of our accomplishments, but we are defined by the singularity of our greatest failure. It does not matter what you have been right about, and it does not matter how… Chuck Klosterman
“ There was a time in our very recent history when it was interesting to be a Star Wars fan. It was sort of like admitting you masturbate twice a day or that your favorite band was They Might Be Giants.… Chuck Klosterman
“ There are very few Americans who honestly care who Lindsay Lohan is dating. But it’s still information they need to have. This is because those people care about something else entirely; they’re worri… Chuck Klosterman
“ The mass media causes sexual misdirection: It prompts us to need something deeper than what we want. This is why Woody Allen has made nebbish guys cool; he makes people assume there is something profo… Chuck Klosterman
“ Tall people are naturally confident. History has proven this - Alexander the Great, Wilt Chamberlain, Gisele. Chuck Klosterman
