Christopher Moore Quotes

»Du hast Heiden vernichtet? Ich dachte, die Erdgeister seien wohlgesinnt.«»Jeder hat mal Aussetzer.

So künde, o Muse, dein KlagenVon Trauer, Krieg und Tücke,Von verlogener Liebesmüh’ und Liederlichstem Rumgeficke …

Жизнь — одиночество, изредка нарушаемое богами, которые дразнят нас своей дружбой и случайным трахом.

That was supposed to be the whole purpose of the Internet, you know. To share scientific information.Not a Viagra- and porn-delivery system?

Most of us don't live our lives with one, integrated self that meets the world, we're a whole bunch of selves.

But Diablo had been built on a breakneck schedule during the energy scare of the seventies. The welders worked double and

By Aladdin's lamplit scrotum, man! Everything is a story. What is there but stories? Stories are the only truth.

In another Christmas story, Dale Pearson, evil developer, self-absorbed woman hater, and seemingly unredeemable curmudgeon, might be visited in the night by a series of ghosts who, by showing him blea...

Down bummer, Charlie said. just chill. he didn't know if chill was an official dog command, but it should be.

I didn’t do anything. I didn’t move a thing, I didn’t touch a thing, I didn’t change a thing. Believers do everything.

Know what I like about mysteries? They’re mysterious.

It's very difficult to stay angry when a room full of bald guys in orange robes start giggling. Buddhism.

You first, Tommy said. They stood in the great room of their loft on either side of the futon, where the huge cat, a crossbreed between a Persian, a dust mop, and possibly a water buffalo, was activel...

Voilà! said the artist, in perfect fucking French.

If you do your job and assume that everyone else is incompetent, you will seldom be disappointed.

There's always a bloody ghost.

If manta rays are going to be harmless, they should look more harmless, Pardee thought. Fuckers look like aquatic Draculas.

Quoi? she had said, in perfect fucking French.

Everyone looks up like rats caught in a spotlight eating the brains of a friend dead in a trap.

Growl, you live in a slime lair and maintain an identity as the mysterious overlord of an undersea city, you command a fleet of meat dreadnaughts with crews of humanoid whale people, and you're curren...