Carla Crumworthy, heiress to the Crumworthy panty-shield fortune. She had come to complain about the collagen injections that Rudy Graveline had administered to give her full, sensual lips, which is j...
Car salesman turned governor. How it fried Dick Artemus to hear himself described like that--the snotty implication being that all car salesman were cagey and duplicitous, unworthy of holding public o...
As she grew older, Erin accepted the fact that her mother was a restless gold digger who would never be happy, never be satisfied. On the other hand, her husbands knew exactly what they were getting a...
As a reporter, Brian Keyes had come to know B.D. Harper fairly well. There was nothing not to like; there simply was nothing much at all.
Also want you to go to an internist. Courtney says the mental degeneration has occurred so rapidly that it could be pathological. A tumor or something.
Would he go for a bribe? Straight cash?''He says it's against his principles,' David Dilbeck said. 'But he's amenable to a free blowjob.'A pulse became visible in Moldowsky's neck. 'Let's see if I und...
Wiley’s behavior had lately become so odd that younger reporters who once sought his counsel were now fearful of his ravings, and they avoided him.
The pilot episode of Bayou Brethren was a major disappointment, the visual appeal of high-def hog shit having been overestimated by a network vice president who was summarily promoted to a more harmle...
The innards of Ping’s G5 were supposedly computer-engineered with a process called finite-element analysis, a term that for all I know was stolen from an old Star Trek episode.
The first time the boy asked when his real dad was getting out of jail, Garcia took the small hand and said: 'Never, Andy.' When the boy asked why, Garcia said: 'Because your daddy shot a man between...
The Curse of the Iguana, he muttered to himself, slouched in the rain.
Stoat asked, 'Are you a manhunter?''More like a shit-scraper,' the visitor replied. 'And I'm starting with you.
Still the congenitally clueless—tourists and locals alike—continue to flop into the Gulf and mess with these phenomenal creatures, dooming them to a future of begging, sloth, and worse. A dolphin that...
Still doing divorces? Al Garcia asked. Here and there. Keyes hated to admit it, but that’s what covered the rent: he’d gotten damn good at staking out nooner motels with his three-hundred-millimeter N...
Soon enough it was explained to Buck Nance that Key West was a bad location to be making fun of homosexuals, and also African-Americans. This bulletin was delivered by a 275-pound biker who happened t...
So that's your man? The 'talent' you manage?''He had a bad night.' Coolman said tightly.Merry cackled. 'A bad night? The dude's a total homophobe! Also a bigot!''There's a culture gap, that's all.''No...
She said there was no tactful way for a naked person to cope with a runny nose, especially while dancing. Orly grudgingly agreed.
Shad pointed to the book on the cocktail table. 'The guy in this story, he turns into a motherfucking centipede. Wakes up one morning and bingo! He's a bug. Sounds asinine, but it sure makes you think...
One more crash, he’d warned my dad, and you’re fired. The guy acting like
One day he just 'snapped.' That's Mom's word for what happened. Some brat yanked one too many times on his tail, and Grandpa Kenneth spun around and punted him halfway down Main Street USA. The kid's...