It's hopeless, Honey told herself. The cocky telephone hustler would go home to Texas unchanged, as vapid and self-absorbed as ever. That a dolt so charmless could attract both a wife and a girlfriend...
In his love life Yancy specialized in devising scenarios that could lead only to unwise decisions.
If God was my co-pilot, Yancy once groused to Burton, I'd have the fucking pedal to the metal soon as I left the garage.
I wouldn't trust the guy alone with my bowling ball, that's what a horndog he is.
Hey, where’s your girlfriend? The one that was down at Flamingo? Oh, she’s home cleaning the machine guns. Tool wasn’t sure if the guy was joking. Then, out of the blue, it hit him—that’s who the pict...
Here, inmates would spend seven days and six nights being drilled on vacation etiquette. For example, they’d be taught how to read speed-limit signs; how to park within the parallel lines of a parking...
Her given name was Lucinda but she’d called herself Juveline since age fifteen, when she’d been caught selling knockoff Burberry totes and a cop at the booking desk misspelled the word juvenile. Big
Her affliction was one of the heart, not the brain. She felt things too deeply and acted on those feelings, and for that there was no known cure. It would explain why all those medicines never worked.
For years Harper had run his own successful public-relations firm, staging predictable dumb stunts like putting a snow machine on the beach in January or mailing a ripe Florida orange to every human b...
Earl, you can’t walk around with a lead slug up your bottom. It’s bound to affect your outlook. Tool jerked his hand away. I’ll get it took care of, I swear. It could well be the turning point in your...
Don’t order the fish, Yancy advised Merry when they sat down. But it’s a seafood joint. More like a petri dish with menus. When they say ‘catch of the day,’ they mean infection. Brennan
Derek wants to do this totally wild and raw. Slow and dumb doesn’t mix with wild and raw. Thanks for your input, Mr. Cray. Seriously. The man almost got killed by the world’s laziest alligator.
Cab Mulcahy poured the coffee. Skip Wiley drank.
But she's just a stripper.'Moldowsky grabbed Dilbeck's shirt. 'Fanne Fox,' he said, 'was just a stripper. Donna Rice was just a model-slash-actress. Elizabeth Ray was just a secretary who couldn't typ...
Buck had lobbied for a banjo player but Lane said they cost too much, which made no fucking sense to Buck because a banjo’s got fewer strings than a damn guitar.
Buck Nance used Lane Coolman's phone to call Krystal. 'Baby, I'm coming home soon,' he said.'Who's this?''Aw, don't be like that.''Wait... now I remember, said his wife. 'You're the scumbag husband wh...
Bernard Beanstoop III, otherwise known as Bernie the Bean, who was only the most famous and most expensive criminal defense lawyer in Tampa.
Tree frogs
He embarked upon an ambitious research project that ultimately connected him with a person named Samuel Johnson Hammernut, known as Red to both friends and enemies. Hammernut’s name had become familia...
Dollars!