If life was fair ... one third of the people would comprise of judges and lawyers ... one third of police and prison officials ... and one third of legislators ... and one third more to make the other...
Billions of years before twelve step groups, God committed shotgun suicide. Today wall scrapings share His gratitude stories.
Ignorance is bliss. Wisdom is blisters.
When to others it's not lying. It's privacy.
Nostalgia was never what it used to be.
I'm all groan up in America.
All surgery and no makeup make Jack a dull girl.
He who laughs last laughs ... doesn't get it.
You can't stop a man from stopping himself.
Self talk and self prayer: When you audible the first and correctly interpret, the white coats correct you in a nuthouse. When you audible the second and misinterpret, the dinner coats swear you to an...
I'm nostalgic for a better tomorrow.
Objects in the mirror are closer than they appear so don't look and they'll stay farther away than you expect they would.
We contradict all for which we stand for we all stand for the lie the whole lie and nothing but the lie so help save our lying asses.
Spare the rod and spoil the Memorial Day rotisserie.
With good morality first candidates you'll get bad candor, bad ethics, bad loyalty and bad morality - lastly bad odor will surface to save the day if you maintain good optimism like I do.
When all seems hopeless, cross your fingers and stick with the secular prayer.
All porn stars on Animal Farm are equal but some porn scenes are more unequal than others.
Our archaeological ancestry lost hair while growing sweat glands to reduce panting in the hot African sun. One outcome evolved the origin of our speech. Another conquered our ability to shut the hell...
If you sense so badly that you also sense a need to make me sense that, then I sense sadly that you cannot make better sense ... sadder still if you cannot sense my sincerity.
I can't answer you in a nutshell. We wouldn't fit unless we saw the same shrink.
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