I shall clasp my hands together and bow to the corners of the world.
I used to love history class. I can still quote whole passages by heart: When the emperor entered the Hall of Balming Virtue, a violent wind came from a dark corner, and out of it slithered a giant se...
I shall clasp my hands together and bow to the corners of the world. May your villages remain ignorant of tax collectors, and may your sons be many and ugly and strong and willing workers, and may you...
I have decided that the problem with poetic justice is that it never knows when to stop.
Immortality is a meaningless word unless invulnerability goes with it.
The emotional health of a village depended upon having a man whom everyone hated.
One of the previous possessors of the stone was Chuang Tzu. He had a disciple who spent seven years studying universal energy and then demonstrated his wisdom by walking across the surface of a river...
Of course there is a slight chance that somebody might want to give the Celestial Bookmaker a heart attack.
Alas, great is my sorrow. Your name is Ah Chen, and when you were born I was not truly pleased. I am a farmer, and a farmer needs strong sons to help with his work, but before a year had passed you ha...
Boy, just look at the soul shining through my eyes! It’s like a goddamned flower!
Nothing on the face of this earth - and I do mean nothing - is half so dangerous as a children's story that happens to be real, and you and I are wandering blindfolded through a myth devised by a mani...
Coge un cuenco grande, dije. Llénalo con medidas iguales de hechos, fantasías, historia, mitología, ciencia, superstición, lógica y locura. Oscurece la mezcla con lágrimas amargas, aclárala con carcaj...
He actually seemed to want an answer, so I shrugged and said, A superior who inherited the job from an uncle rams a barge pole up his ass.
I have never been able to understand why perfectly sensible people waste time being wittily obscure instead of just saying what they want and going on about their business.
O great and mighty Master Li, pray impart to me the Secret of Wisdom! he bawled.Take a large bowl, I said. Fill it with equal measures of fact, fantasy, history, mythology, science, superstition, logi...
O great and mighty Master Li, pray impart to me the Secret of Wisdom!’ he bawled. A silly smile was sliding down the side of his face like a dripping watercolor, and his eyeballs resembled a pair of p...
Ginseng hunters refer to the plant as chang-diang shen, the root of lightning, because it is believed that it appears only on the spot where a small mountain spring has been dried up by a lightning bo...
Our senses are woefully limited. Our brains are but tiny candles flickering in an infinity of darkness. Our only wisdom is to admit that we cannot understand, and since we cannot understand we must do...
Is it any wonder that our greatest men have lurched rather than walked across the landscape as they hiccupped their way into history? Sir, that’s the best autobiography I ever heard! I said enthusiast...
Master Li turned bright red while he scorched the air with the Sixty Sequential Sacrileges with which he had won the all-China Freestyle Blasphemy Competition in Hangchow three years in a row.
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