Is what we communicate with our eyes. The way we look at someone can communicate trust, distrust, dislike, hatred, admiration, joy, and even love. When we want to connect with someone on a deeper leve...
The more you can simply feel the emotion without going into a story about why you were not good enough, the more quickly it will pass through you. This disappointment can serve to remind you
If you do not plan on speaking publicly, this communication secret can help ensure that others are hearing you clearly, and are listening to what you’re saying. It will also help you gain greater resp...
The main takeaway here is that rejection not only could mean something else, it most always does. The key is to first become aware of the fact that your idea of its meaning—that you are at fault, that...
The same holds true for social anxiety—which we can also call social phobia, or social fear. In this case, you’re afraid that others will judge, ridicule, dislike, or reject you. As you work your way...
Personalizing is a term used to describe taking too much personal responsibility for a situation that involves multiple people and multiple elements. It occurs when we conclude that the rejection was...
When you name your critic, you tell your subconscious that the critic is not you. This reinforces that the harsh, negative thoughts are simply ideas in your mind. They do not reflect clear facts or th...
Sometimes when we attack ourselves, we feel like we are the only ones suffering in a particular way. This can lead to feelings of personal inadequacy and loneliness, which can exacerbate an already ov...
The old propaganda campaign will slowly influence you over time to believe that things cannot change and you are stuck the way you are. This door is open only for a short while, and you must make the...
I have identified other parts as well. The part of me that is terribly frightened that something might go wrong in the future is The Blind Prophet.
The ultimate point is to see that aside from what happens in our own minds, the actual harm or danger of rejection is often very minor.
The problem with assuming disapproval is that we tend to perceive, and even actively create, what we expect to happen in our lives. If you are certain that someone is not going to like you, then when...
Through repetition, you can start to alter the way you see yourself, thus changing your identity. The process is simple, yet powerful. It involves taking your list and stating your strengths out loud,...
For a list of recommended Les Brown materials, see the Recommended Resources section at the end of the book.
Les Brown is an incredibly inspiring speaker who strongly encourages people to pursue their dreams with passion and persistence. His book It’s Not Over Until You Win (New York: Fireside, 1997) contain...
The first time I stumbled across this principle, I thought it was a fluke. But as I practiced doing this each time I made a mistake, it became very clear to me that people did not seem to notice the m...
Say each phrase out loud, with emphasis, energy, and emotional intensity. Keep in mind that you may have repeated negative statements about your weaknesses thousands of times over the years. In order...
Something powerful happens inside of us when we make the shift from avoidance to approach when it comes to fear. Your fear hierarchy is precisely designed to help you make this shift. Instead of viewi...
There are three ways to respond to your critic that you might find particularly helpful: defense, questioning, and acceptance. The first way is to directly challenge your critic, saying something like...
During my public speaker training, I learned it is inevitable that I will sometimes misspeak, stumble over my words, or make some sort of mistake. This prospect used to terrify me, and it was one of t...
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