“ This is a wonderful way to celebrate an 80th birthday... I wanted to be 65 again, but they wouldn't let me - Homeland Security. Art Buchwald
“ Dinner is not what you do in the evening before something else. Dinner is the evening. Art Buchwald
“ I explained to him I had simple tastes and didn't want anything ostentatious no matter what it costs. Art Buchwald
“ You can't make up anything anymore. The world itself is a satire. All you're doing is recording it. Art Buchwald
“ We seem to be going through a period of nostalgia, and everyone seems to think yesterday was better than today. I don't think it was, and I would advise you not to wait ten years before admitting toda… Art Buchwald
“ And Man created the plastic bag and the tin and aluminum can and the cellophane wrapper and the paper plate, and this was good because Man could then take his automobile and buy all his food in one pl… Art Buchwald
